


Lover's Suicide

by Flingbert



Category: Yu-Gi-Oh! VRAINS
Genre: F/M, Modern AU, No card games, no vrains, nothing bad happens but depression is a b, suicide attempt/mention
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-18
Updated: 2019-12-18
Packaged: 2021-02-26 06:53:33
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,944
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21845485
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Flingbert/pseuds/Flingbert
Summary: Yusaku has especially depressing night and decides to take the bus to a famous suicide spot to jump but meets aoi who's also there to jump and they talk it out after initial hostility. Yusaku is the creepy quiet kid in class and she is a popular rich girl but they find themselves in the same place at the same time, they only know each other casually and through bias. Yusaku kinda a jerk at first but he's just fragile hearted :( Aoi trying to keep up appearances even tho she looks a mess.
Relationships: Fujiki Yuusaku/Zaizen Aoi
Kudos: 15





	Lover's Suicide

**Author's Note:**

> I also wrote this for class and changed the names. Aoi was angella and Yusaku was William because William reminds me of willow tree which is what fujiki means in japanese is what ive heard. Just fun facts. Its not really a lovers story but u can take it that way if u want.

"Lover's Suicide"

Ground was sloshing beneath me as I stepped off the stairs, I felt the moist ground through my shoes even though my socks had already become drenched. It was probably the last bus of the night, not that it really mattered. I let my heart sink into the mud as well, the bus doors closed and the lights glided along my back. Tonight wasn’t especially depressing, but it seemed like everything just fell into place. The usual PTSD induced nightmare, the thunderstorm shaking my decrepit apartment, the bus that comes once an hour showing up the second I step outside for some air, and on it goes. It’s almost like the world was asking me to end my life. Maybe this cradling feeling of fate made me feel safe. I sighed, and began walking forward on the cliff trail upwards.

The hike was actually pretty long, not extremely so, but probably the most exercise I’ve ever had in my life. All I usually have to keep me through the day is the usual post nightmare cereal at 3 in the morning, I guess that keeps me slim (God bless cheerios). In gym class I also made it a point to forget my gym clothes week. The teacher thinks I’m an idiot and the class thinks I’m a condescending slacker. Maybe I am condescending, but as for slacker I call it select effort. Honestly it baffles me that they are so content in their small worlds - the new Riverdale season, karaoke outings, which football team they’re gonna lose to next, fussing over how apparently hot the new substitute math teacher is, on it goes. Then again, it’s not any of them hiking miserably out of breath to reach a famous suicide spot at 3 in the morning in the pouring rain with barely a shred of feeling other than numb on the inside and out. Maybe that’s how it should’ve been for me too. Man, this really feels like garbage.

Finally I reach the top, there are some benches overlooking the area. I slug myself over to a bench, take a seat, and give out a loud groan, “GOD, I’m so fucking exhausted.” My sight is all hazy and I’m panting, maybe this wasn’t the perfect night, I feel like shit, but in a feasible kind of way, not in a way that’s usually invisible and in my head. I lift my head to check my phone by habit, my face is reflected in the screen. Hair is clinging to my face and my collared shirt has become see through. My cheeks and nose are shot red, otherwise pale as a ghost. Clear snot is making its way down from my nose to my chin from the cold. All I could do was laugh, that is, until I had a near heart attack when I heard,

“What are you doing here, creep.”

She’s wearing our school uniform, her phone is held close to her so as that it illuminates her expression. Her words are harsh but she doesn’t seem offended by my presence, at least from what I could tell. It is obvious she’s shivering from the cold, and it’s also obvious that she had been here longer than I had and more than likely saw me talking to myself. None of this, however, had probably changed her perception of me as already being insane.

“Zaizen Aoi.” I named with a dead expression.

“Fujiki Yuusaku.” she replies, “Why are you here, you didn’t follow me here did you?”

“Get over yourself,” I say, “I wasn’t expecting anyone else to be here. Anyways, I guess the mood is ruined, I’m going home.”

“Going home? It’s almost 4am you really think any buses come here that late? What mood? You really are weird you know that? If you’re not following me anyways then why are you even here? God you’re such a freak.” She was sounding more defensive than anything at this point, she went from dead sounding to accusing, although she’s standing and I’m sitting, our positions are likely not so different.

“I came here to jump, same as you”, I sigh and get up to stretch, “although I’m not really in the mood for a ‘lover’s suicide’, it kind of takes away from the whole thing” I smile. My bluntness and sarcasm clearly upsets her, which I choose to ignore.

“You’re delusional.” she says without hesitation.

“One, it’s cold, raining heavily, and freezing cold. Two, this location is difficult to get to and leave from at this time of night. Three, the last thing you wanted was for anyone to see you, especially not the condescending freak from your second period science class.” I count on my fingers in front of her.

“Why would I want to jump?” she asks, more like questions, waiting for my perception, or maybe even pity. I wasn’t going to give that to her, she wasn’t a bad person, she just wasn’t on the same side of the world that I was,

“It doesn’t matter to me, I’m leaving.” I say without looking at her.

“Wait.”

This was getting kind of annoying, she’s really making all this out to be a big deal, I look back at her, “I really won’t try to stop you, I promise.” I raise my hands and shrug.

She opens her mouth hesitantly, “No, I wanted to ask why you do that. Why you always count in threes. I’ve always wondered where you got that from.”

She was serious. I hadn't thought anyone would have noticed that about me considering I usually say maybe 10 whole words at school a day. One, she might have overheard the time I was listing off reasons the kid who sat in front of me was an idiot after he had continued to flex how good he is at League of Legends. Two, perhaps when a girl asked me out in front of everyone and I bluntly told her 3 reasons why she had no meaning to me. Three, or maybe it was when the teacher had taken me aside after class and asked me why I’m so quiet, to which I listed that his class was boring and I actually had slept through most of it (resulting in detention). Okay, so there were quite a few possibilities when I actually thought about it. Still, a wonder she actually picked it up.

I open my mouth to speak, but it’s hard for anything to come out. I haven't attempted to be this vulnerable since my 6th therapist advised that maybe a healthy diet including more veggies and less stale cereal was the way to go. I try anyways,

“... I used it as a coping mechanism when I was young. I don’t remember anything from before I was six years old. Apparently I was kidnapped and tortured as a child. The only thing I remember was a voice from the room next to me of another child. He would say, ‘think of three things. Three reasons to keep on living. Three reasons to get out of here. Three reasons to keep fighting. Three things are all you need.’ Kind of stupid really, there could be a million reasons for something in opposition, but I was told I needed three to keep going. I don’t know who that child was, I heard he wasn’t among the children found. And well, I guess that habit followed me.” I was looking at her as if she was about to shoot me dead at any moment, quite terrifying really. I’m not a fan of revealing my past, but seeing as though this could be the last chance to do so, maybe it won’t hurt as bad later. She looked at me as if I had been the one to shoot her, her eyes wide and mouth slightly opened,

“I had no idea… I’m really sorry Fujiki.”

“Don’t be.” I give a pathetic smile, “What about you princess? What kind of problems would lead ‘The Zaizen Aoi’ to have a therapy session post hike in the middle of buttfuck nowhere? Isn't your brother a hot-shot CEO? Surely you’d rather be sitting in your fancy 18 story apartment in front of your cozy fireplace and fancy 4K TV or whatever it is these days. I don’t really know.” I know I said it rudely but it seemed she had gotten to understand that this is just how I talk, constantly deflecting. I felt awkward.

“I wasn’t actually going to jump just so you know. I just wasn’t… feeling good. I needed to be somewhere else. I know my problems don’t match up to yours, but don’t believe that your experiences put you in a whole other world than everyone else,” She began to cry, not for herself but for me. I put my head down unable to look at her, I don’t remember the last time I actually cried. This was kind of embarrassing. She continued, “I don’t know what your life is like now, but this won’t lead to anything.”

Zaizen started walking towards the cliff’s edge, I was absolutely shocked. Had she not just been talking about NOT jumping? “ZAIZEN STOP! Okay, I’m serious, I get it, I didn’t mean it that I don’t care. I mean, I don’t know you that well but I seriously don’t wanna see this.” She continued until her toes were overlooking the height below. I walked cautiously towards her holding out my hand, she turned around, wiped her tears with her sleeve, smiled at me, and then disappeared below. I screamed like a bitch, then when I finally stopped screaming, I realized that I could hear her laughter. I felt like I was beginning to go crazy, I could hear a girl’s laughter in the middle of nowhere after just having experienced the second most traumatizing thing in my life. It sounded like Zaizen though, so maybe it was a friendly ghost. I made my way towards the perimeter, got on my hands and knees and looked downwards to check. She had been caught by a net built for catching those wishing to end their lives, this really was a famous spot.

“You’re absolutely insane. Legitimately, what is wrong with you?” It was a rhetorical question. I felt like I needed some comfort after almost having my second heart attack of the day.

“Jumping won’t lead you anywhere, you have to be more creative than that. I wanted to get your heart beating again. I think it worked?” She was being sarcastic, she seems to have known there was a net in this area; maybe she had tried before, or maybe she was just well informed. As she talked she had her arms and legs spread out like a starfish on the shore, she looking up at me, “I’ve got an idea. Let’s think of three things to keep going. When we can’t think of anything anymore, then let’s meet here again. In the meantime, come down and let’s think of some things together until someone comes and gets us in the morning. The buses don’t run anymore, remember? Deal?”

Oh God, she was catching onto my unbearably patronizing habits. She’s crazy if she thinks I’d jump down with her, which I guess she is. I jump and land right on top of her and blow the air right out of her. We are even more drenched in rain than before as the net splatters particles all over us. I don’t know if I should laugh or cry, but I do feel a pretty strong emotion right now - something unique that I haven't felt before - alive.


End file.
